I didn’t want to return home tonight. I haven’t felt this way in over a year, the last time was very regrettable and stressful. No matter where I go I feel as if I have an obligation to return home. It doesn’t matter if it’s super late or if I’m doing something of extreme importance, I will always return home.
You can only imagine how odd and rare it is for me to ever feel this way, but tonight happen to be one of those nights. My current situation at home is stressful and some what disappointing. I realize today, now that I have time to reflect, that I have so much resentment buried deep in me. I’ve managed to keep those negative emotions to myself for so long in order to keep the calm in my family. Every step I’ve made has always been for the greater good of the family. Years of sitting in the back has finally caught up to me. Being told that my dream and passion is a waste of time and money by the only two people I thought would’ve understood is a crushing blow in the face. I feel as though a part of that support and guidance has collapse upon me. I placed so much trust on those pillars that now I’m buried in its rubble. It’s time for me to do what I want. I can only look to my close friends and other relatives for help now.